I Thought You Loved Me
by justaluckybug
Summary: Terra is back but is that a good thing? Beastboy's not so sure because now he has to decide who he loves his long lost girlfriend or his recent love. BBRae Robstar
1. Nightmares

**Hi, this is my second fanfic so I'm still getting used to it. Hope u like!**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own the teen titans, nuf said. **

I Thought You Loved Me?

Chapter 1: Nightmares

_He walked down the empty road. There was nothing there, nothing but the clear glass road. He walked timidly down the invisible floor, testing every step. Suddenly two figures appeared in front of him. Terra and Raven. They were both tied down. "You must pick which one to save or they will both die a slow and painful death," boomed a bodiless voice. _

"_Help me BB!" Terra cried. _

"_Gar, please!" Raven said, tears in both their eyes. _

"_I thought you loved me!" they said in unison. Beastboy breathed hard, looking from the blonde fun loving girl to the dark gothic girl. How could he choose between the two people he loved most? _

"_What if I can't choose," he yelled to the disembodied voice. He fell to his knees, his head in his hands. _

"_Then they both shall die!" the voice replied. The invisible road fell away leaving the three heroes to fall into an unknown darkness. _

_"Nooooo!" Beastboy's cry was all that was left. It echoed sadly through the nothingness. _

Garfield Logan woke from his dream panting. No not a dream, a nightmare. "_I thought you loved me!" _The girls' cry came back to him, repeating over and over in his head. He had recently been suffering from these repetitive nightmares. Every night they seemed to get worse, but tonight's was more then he could bare. He knew what the dreams meant. They meant exactly what they said – He had to chose; between his long-lost girlfriends or his recent crush. If you left it at this, some one would say "Are you kidding? If it's just crush go for girlfriend." But the fact was it wasn't just a crush. He loved her, he was just too afraid to say something. He was sure she felt it too, that spark when their hands accidentally brushed when they walked past each other, or when they glanced at each other at the exact same moment. That feeling like they couldn't look away, like some magnetic force was pulling together. He loved Raven, and he was sure she loved him too.

But then there was Terra. She had broken his heart, (and Raven, of course, was there to comfort him) but when she had come out of her apparent 'amnesia' he had taken her back like nothing ever happened. Like she never tried to take over the world, like she never tried to kill all of the Titans, like she never made him feel so awful inside. He had forgotten all that, and taken her back. He was doing fine, he was even starting to heal; he was starting to get over it, but then she had to come back into his. A part him knew she was just going to break his heart again and that he should just go tell her off, he had Raven. But then there was this other part of him. The part that said this great, the love of your life is back, you should be thanking the universe for being so kind and answering your prays. Had he really prayed for this? This heart break, the heart break that came when you were to decide between the love of your life and some girl you used love.

He couldn't go on like this, only getting a few hours of sleep each night. It wasn't good for him, it wasn't good for anybody. All the Titans worried about him when he came into the common room 'looking like he had just fought a pack of wolves' as Cy had put it. He could see the worry in their eyes, the sideward glances to make sure he was ok. But truthfully, he wasn't ok. How could he be?

Just as these thoughts enter his disturbed little head, a knocking at his door, made him jump. "Who is it? He asked, too tired to go see for himself.

"It's Raven, are you ok?" a voice said from behind his door. Oh grate, because this couldn't get any worse, he thought, but of course didn't say it.

"Yea, I just had a nightmare that's all," he said, trying to sound convincing. He could tell it didn't work, Raven knew him too well.

"Um, sure. I was just wondering, you know, because I couldn't get to sleep so I was awake when you were having that nightmare and well…" her voice trailed off. Oh god she saw the dream, what am I going to tell her? BB thought, breathing hard again.

"And what, Rae?" he asked, panic setting in.

"Um, well, you see…look do you want to talk or something?" Raven asked. He could tell she was uncomfortable. When he didn't say anything, she continued. "Ok, well if you ever want to talk, I'm always here." Gar smiled at this, he knew she felt it to. He heard her start to walk back to her room, but she stopped. "You think you're alone, Beastboy, but your not," Rae said, quoting him. Beastboy's smile grew, but it soon faded altogether when an image from his dream came back to him. It was Raven. Her face when she had fallen from the invisible walkway. It was so full of hurt, pain, betrayal, that it mage Gar's heart ache.

"What am I gonna do?" he said aloud and fell back onto his bed, sighing. Why was love so hard?

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Raven had seen it. She had seen the nightmare, well part of it. She had seen her, Terra, and Beastboy fall from some clear glass thing into darkness. She had heard Gar's cry when they had fallen. She obviously missed most of it and because of that she didn't know what it meant. Why did she care? Why was she so interested in Beastboy all of a sudden? '_Cause you love hi, Rae-Rae!' _An annoying little voice said. Oh grate, you again she thought. '_Even though I hate to admit it, Affection is right; you obviously have feelings for Garfield. You should confront him about it.' _Knowledge said matter-of-factly. '_What if we do and he doesn't want to be our friend anymore! What would we do then?' _Timid asked, hiding behind Bravery. _'Maybe we should just kill him that would solve that problem!' _Rage said, in an evil voice. _'No!' _all of her emotions shouted at once. This is going to be a long night!

**Okay so there's the first chapter, hope you like it. If you don't it can always be a oneshot. Please review!!!**

** Forever-Jinxed-13 **


	2. Talks

**Hey guys! So here's chapter 2. I tried to make it longer. Hope you like! **

Beast Boy walked into the common room looking awful again. Luckily though, the rest of the team was still asleep. Except for Raven, that is. She seemed to be in some sort of trance. She didn't even look up when he walked in. So he went to the kitchen and made himself a bowl of cereal. The two sat at the table across from one another, totally unaware of each others presents. Just then the silence was broken.

"Gooood morning ya'll!" Cyborg yelled as he came into the room. When no response came back he looked down at the two titans sitting at the table. "Wa…" he said, amazed at their appearance. "Dude, what happen to you two? Did you try to kill each other again? I told ya, if you're gonna kill each other tell me so I can make popcorn." Still no sound. "Helloooo, anyone home?" Cyborg asked coming down to the table and waving his hand in front of Beast Boy's face. "Man, what is going on here?"

Beast Boy blinked and then looked at the metal man as if he had just noticed him. "Oh hey, Cyborg, when did you come in?" Cyborg just stood and stared at the little green changeling.

"Dude, you really need to get some sleep, I mean look at ya," Cyborg said pointing at his friend.

"What?" Beast Boy looked down at his uniform. It was one backwards. "Huh, I guess I didn't notice." He stood up and went to look at himself in the mirror. His hair was a mess and he had bags under his eyes big enough to hold his groceries in. "Huh," was all he said and went back to sit at the table.

"Man, wait till Robin see's ya," Cyborg replied and as if on cue the leader of the team walked in.

"Good morning, everyone! Beast Boy you're up early," Robin said and then looked back at the green teen. "Beast Boy have you had any sleep in the past three days?" Robin asked loudly. Beast Boy didn't reply, he just sat at the table and ate his cereal. "You better try and get some sleep or you won't have enough strength for our next mission.

Suddenly Beast Boy jumped up. "You think I haven't tried!" he yelled. "Do you think I would look like this if I could? It's not like I don't want to go to sleep, I can't!" he yelled and sat back down in his seat. Cyborg and Robin just stood there, their mouths open, shocked from Beast Boys sudden outburst.

Raven hadn't been paying attention to the conversation at all since Cyborg came in, snapped out of her trance. She looked worriedly at Beast Boy. It must have been the nightmares. That's why he couldn't get to sleep.

"I don't know what to do anymore. As soon as I fall asleep I have these nightmares. They haunt me, even when I'm awake they come back to me," Beast Boy said still not making eye contact with his fellow teammates. He just stared down at the bowl in front of him.

"BB, do you want to talk about them?" Cyborg asked now even more worried about his friend. Beast Boy looked up at Raven, and then back at the table. He didn't say anything. The metal teen looked at Raven, confused. Raven looked back at him and smiled, she knew what he wanted.

"It's ok, Beast Boy, I'll go," she said and walked over to him. She squeezed his shoulder and went to her room. As soon as the doors closed Cyborg said,

"Dude, why don't you want Raven to hear, I thought you guys where like really close," Cyborg asked and took the seat across from Beast Boy.

"Because, she was in my nightmare," he replied his voice low and a little horse.

"Oh," was all that came out of the metal man's mouth.

"So go on," Robin said and took a seat beside Beast Boy.

"Okay so I keep having these nightmares," Beast Boy started.

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Raven sat in her room trying to figure out why Beast Boy didn't want to have her in the room. _"He obviously didn't want you to hear because, as you know, you were in his dream," Knowledge said. _What could he dream about me and Terra? Raven thought. _"Maybe he likes you, oh I hope that's it," squealed Love. _ Wait, what? Why do I want him to like me? You right we already answered that. I like him. Raven sighed and walked out into the hall. She needed to go to the roof to meditate. But she wasn't paying attention and bumped into Starfire.

"Oh I am sorry, friend Raven! Are you injured?" Starfire said and helped her friend off the ground. "I was heading to the kitchen to have the break of fast. Would you like to join me?" she asked.

"Actually, I wouldn't go in there if I was you," Raven replied and brushed herself off.

"Why not? Are we going to eat out?"

"No, it's just Beast Boy is in there talking to Robin and Cyborg about something, it's kind of like a guy thing,"

"Oh they are having the 'talk of the boys'. Do you wish to have the 'talk of the girls'?

"Uh…" Raven thought. She didn't want Star to go and bother the boys but on the other hand she didn't really want to talk to her either. "_Maybe you should go talk to her, she might be able to help with you Beast Boy problem," Knowledge said. _You're right, ok fine, I'll talk to her. "Sure, Star, I'd love to talk to you."

"Oh that is most wonderful!" Starfire squealed. "Maybe we should go wake Terra, then we all could talk about the girl talk."

"No!" Raven cried, that would not end well. "I mean, I kind of wanted to talk to you about something, alone, without Terra."

"Ok friend Raven, then it will just be you and me," Starfire said and grabbed Ravens hand and started to drag her to her room.

What have I gotten myself into? Raven thought and fallowed the alien girl.

**Ok so there it's not that long but I really am trying to make them longer. I'll try to get the next chapter up soon! Please review!**

**Forever-Jinxed-13**


	3. Flashback and a Broken Heart

**So here's chapter 3. I hope you like it. It's longer then the others. Still not that much longer but I'm doing better. Please R&R!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans, nuf said.**

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Chapter 3: Flashback and a Broken Heart

Raven let out a loud sigh as she closed Starfire's door. She wondered what time it was, she must have been in the alien's room for hours. She was going to tell Starfire about her love problems, but she rethought it. After Starfire had gone on and on about how cute a couple Terra and Beast Boy were, she had to reconsider.

Then Starfire had explained the plan for tomorrow. Tomorrow, she had feared that day for two months now. Tomorrow was going to be the one year anniversary of the worst day of Raven's life. No it wasn't the anniversary of the day her father came to rule earth and it wasn't the day she had her heart broken by Malchior, but her heart was broken on this day. Tomorrow was the one year anniversary of the day that blonde haired traitor walked back into their lives. (Just incase your confused, I'm talking about Terra) Raven could remember that day like it was yesterday.

--FLASHBACK--

Raven sat on the edge of the roof of the T tower, her legs dangling. The sun was setting and was lighting up the sky with beautiful colors. She took a deep breath. Today was the day, the day she would finally confess her fondness of her fellow titan. It had taken years for her to admit , to herself, that she might have an itsy-bitsy, molecule-sized, crush on him. Her breath caught in her throat when he sent her one of his famous smiles, her heart beat fast when she walked past him, when she glanced at him and he noticed, that feeling of nervousness, excitement, joy, hate, all at the same time was wonderful and awful. It was very confusing, but she loved it. She had to admit it - she had a little, tiny, itty-bitty, crush on Beast Boy.

She loved the way he tried to get her to smile and laugh even though she kept pushing him away. It made her feel wanted and cared for, because he tried so very hard. She wasn't even sure why she did that to him, she saw his face after she snapped at him, and the way his ears drooped and he frowned, showing his little fang. It broke her heart to see him like that, but the truth was she did it because she was scared. She was scared that if she let herself laugh and smile and be happy something bad would happen to her, to her friends, to him. She couldn't let herself do that, so she pushed him away.

Raven had asked Beast Boy after dinner to come up on the roof so she could talk to him. She knew he'd be late, but she didn't care, it gave her time to try and figure out what she was going to say. Eventually she heard footsteps climb the stairs to the roof and come to sit beside her.

"Hey, Rae, what's up?" Beast Boy asked after he had sat down next to the blue caped girl. Even though she knew he was there, Raven couldn't help but jump at the sound of his voice and blush a little because he sat so close.

"It's Raven and I wanted to talk to you about something, something important," she replied and readied herself to start the well rehearsed speech on her feelings for him.

"Ok, go 'head, I'm listening," the green hero said and turned to face her. Just as Raven opened her mouth to speak, the doorbell rang. She jumped and her heart began to race. She was so close. "Leave it, some one will get it, I really need to tell you this," Raven said, emphasizing the 'really'.

"It's ok, I'll be right back. Stay here," he said and morphed into a green sparrow and flew down to the door. Raven sat there waiting for him to come back. She decided she should meditate while he was gone, so she took her position and sat cross legged in the air. She chanted her mantra and soon she could feel herself calm down and her heartbeat return to normal. It was a while later she noticed that Beast Boy had yet to come back. So she opened her eyes and was surprised to see how dark the sky was. She wondered where Beast Boy was. _'He probably came and saw how relaxed I was and had decided to leave me be.'_ She thought this as she walked down the steps and made her way to the common room.

When she walked in she noticed a bit of blond hair visible on the couch. She felt her self tense up. Everyone turned when she walked in, and when the blonde head turned, Raven couldn't help but let a gasp escape her lips. She took a few steps back in shock. Her eyebrows went down and she was about to through the traitor out the window, when she felt a hand on her shoulder. It was Robin, he had a kind and understanding look on her face, but it didn't calm her mood.

"It's ok Raven, Terra has her memories back and is on the team again," the leader said taking his hand off Raven. She didn't like to be touched, he knew that. Raven felt her heart break a bit when he said this. She looked back at the couch. Beast Boy sat on one side of the traitor with his arm around her while she snuggled up to him. Her heart broke a little more. Just then Cyborg's stomach started to grumble.

"I guess we skipped dinner," he laughed and started to look through the fridge for something to fill his stomach until dinner was ready. He looked at Terra and said, "In honor of you coming back to the team, Terra, I'm gonna cook anything you want," he said, a huge grin on his face.

"Do you think we could go out for pizza?" Terra asked and looked hopefully at the team. There was chorus of 'sure' from everyone, except Raven, and it was decided. A few minutes later the team was ready to go out to dinner.

They were just about to leave when Starfire remembered Raven. "Friend Raven, do you wish to join us?" she asked hopefully.

"No, I think I'll just head to bed if you don't mind, I'm not really feeling well," she said truthfully. She wasn't feeling well, actually she felt like any moment she would cough up her half broken heart.

"Are you going to be alright without us?" Robin asked grabbing his coat.

She nodded. "I'll be fine."

"Well, if you need anything just give a call," he said pointing to his communicator, "and we'll come right home, ok?"

She nodded again, afraid if she said too much her heart might actually come up. They all nodded and walked out the door. As soon as they did, Raven ran and through herself on the couch and wept into a pillow. Things started to brake and melt but she didn't care.

Just then Beast Boy realized he forgot his coat in the common room and ran to get it. When he got there he gasped, just as Raven had done a few minutes ago. The room was basically destroyed, everything was either broken in half or close to it. It was then he noticed Raven, crying her heart out on the couch. He ran over to her and started stroking her hair.

"Raven, what's wrong?" he asked soothingly.

"Terra," she choked between sobs.

"What?"

Raven sat up, her sadness replaced by sudden anger. "Terra! You love her! You still love her even though she basically tried to kill us and take over the world and broke your heart! She betrayed us and you still love her!" Raven screamed and the big glass window that looks out on the city broke into a billion pieces but neither seemed to notice.

Beast Boy stood up now filled with rage. "That's not why you hate her. You hate her because she's better than you. She's smarter, she's prettier, she's a better fighter, I could go on and on about the things she's better at. And you know we all like her more than you. You are worthless!" he yelled back. He hadn't meant to say the last part because that was the worst possible thing you could say to Raven. Her whole life people had been telling her she was worthless and it hurt her more than anything to hear her friends say it too.

Raven shrunk back immediately after she heard this, tears spilled out again. "Raven," he started but she sunk into the couch. He was sure she would end up in her room. He felt bad, but it suddenly went away when he remember what Raven had said about Terra. How could she say that? He stormed out of the tower. His friends looked at him, confused. They had heard the commotion and where wondering what happened but he didn't say anything. He went over and grabbed Terra's hand and started to the pizza place.

Raven was in her room now. She fell onto her bed and sobbed even harder than before. Her heart was now in two halves. He said she was worthless, how could he say that? He was her friend. That's right he **was **her friend, but not anymore. She sobbed harder at this thought. Hours later she sat up and changed into her pjs. She stared at herself in the mirror. "Happy birthday Raven" she said to herself and lay back on her bed. That's right it was her birthday, but not even her friends remember. They were too caught up in Terra to care anyway. Like Beast Boy said, they liked her better. At this she started to cry again. Hours later she finally cried herself to sleep.

She stilled liked him after that, but the two went eleven months only speaking to each other when absolutely necessary. But in the last month Beast Boy couldn't take it. He missed her. He missed talking to her. He missed the fact that no matter what he said or how stupid it was she would always listen, not laugh or make fun of him like the others did. He missed trying to get her to smile even though it was pointless. So he had begged her to forgive him. Getting down on his knees and begging. After awhile she couldn't take the look on his face and finally gave in. Raven had missed him too. She missed him smiling at her. She missed him trying to get her to laugh. She missed him more that he knew. And even though their friendship was never the same, they were friends and that's all that mattered.

END OF FLASHBACK

Raven didn't realize she had been standing at Starfire's door the whole time she was thinking. She quickly walked to her room and got ready for bed. She tried everything to get to sleep. She even tried counting sheep but when she did they were green. At 4 in the morning she fell asleep from pure exhaustion.

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**So there's the chapter. I hope you like it. Please review! **

**-Forever-Jinxed-13-**


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